c0mments!
I'm nothing but an asshole,
Most of the people wan me to be myself,
But after thinking thoroughly i think to be the opposite of what they want,
Being what they want me to be is giving them a chance to criticize me,
I will not let them seize the chance to criticize me,
Whats the point, No matter what i do,
I just feel that i am being played around,
tricking myself into believing i was happy,
Tricking myself to just smile in front of everyone to not let them see how i truly feel,
people may be thinking that i am crapping because only a few have seen how i really feel,
People whom i really cares about me have actually seen me feeling down,
How i long for a real laugh,How i long to really smile instead of show a fake smile,
Its been a long time since i really felt happy,
After going through last year, i really feel like going back to being a child,
A child that has no worries, that just plays until he's tired,
A child who dont have to study, a child that do not need to care about appearance,
A kid that doesn't have to pay for his own meals,
A kid that can just sleep for how long he wants and watch tv,
A Kid that doesn't know what love is,
a kid that really don know how love hurts,
Just a little kid.
How sometimes i may feel envious seeing how others are happy being together,
how sometimes i feel sad to know that i'm always being criticize,
How useless,careless i am.
Why do i fall in love with someone i cant be with?
Why should i even bother to see if others feel sad,
Why do i bother even comforting them when i know they will just forget about it when they are happy again, How i treat others and how others treat me are totally different,
Maybe helping someone doesn't need anything in return but then,
Being help is something i usually dont get.
I can't bear to see anyone being sad but others can bear to see me being sad.
What do they do? talk to others and pretend to not see me or just keep quiet.
Friends, i dont really think i have friends,
Friends scold u like a parent,
irritates u like a sister,
cares for u like a lover,
but none of my friends are like that.
My friends are just hi-bye people, who usually do not care about my existence,
My existence is nothing more than a mistake that was write into the book of existence.
My life is a mistake my existence itself is a mistake.
i should just disappear into thin air.
But i cant if i was able to control my own life, How great will it be.
Sighs, All well doesnt end well for me
I Played @
11:13 PM
